Episode 7: Teapocalypse Now!!!

All right, I've got to confess: I am really proud of this one. And I beg you to take a listen. I think you'll find it funny--and funky, of course.




Parliament – Chocolate City   
Bilal Salaam – Fa Sho   
Outkast – Rosa Parks   
Talib Kweli & Hi Tek feat. Res – Back Again   
T-Love – When You’re Older (Ode to the Pickaninny)   


Embryo – Abdul Malek   
Pere Ubu – On the Surface   
Passion Pit – The Reeling   
Little Dragon – Runabout   
White Flight – Children of the Light   


Gil Scott-Heron – The Revolution Will Not Be Televised   
Boscoe – We Ain’t Free   
Public Enemy – Can’t Truss It   
X-Clan – Fire & Earth (100% Natural)   
The Chequers – Get Up, Stand Up   


El Guincho – Bombay   
Joe Bataan – Aftershower Funk   
War – Low Rider   
Charo & The Salsoul Orchestra – Cuchi-Cuchi   
Ely Guerra – Yo No   


Bethlehem Progressive Ensemble – Call to Worship (Make Way)   
Cliff Gober – A Poor Wayfaring Stranger   
William Bell – Save Us   
The Isley Brothers – Harvest for the World   
The Road Home – Birds   


Bobby McFerrin – Don’t Worry Be Happy

Lazy Man's Movie Review: Blood: The Last Vampire

A 1970 American airbase in Japan is being terrorized by demons. And only a katana-wielding, Satan spawn-slaying, racially confused Japanese demon hunter (Gianna Jun) can save them honkeys' asses so they can keep bombing the shit out of her Asian brothers and sisters in Vietnam.

OK, that ain't exactly how it's portrayed. I just wanted to use the word "honkey" in a sentence. You know, express my inner Sherman Helmsley.

Blood is really and truly horribly acted. I swear half of the "Americans" in this film have Australian accents, and Gianna Jun's English is awkward, at best. Like 90 percent of its Hollywood horror counterparts, this Sino-Hong Kong-French production set in Japan starring a South Korean actress degenerates into a "Save the White Chick" movie. Seriously, I asked my brutha, Yaphet Koto, this back in '79 with Alien: If all they're gonna do is scream and cry and eventually get your ass killed, can't you just pull your Social Darwinism card, say, "See ya!" and let the big bad monster eat they asses?

I'm just sayin'.

Too Old for This

Ya know, I'm a reasonable guy--fairly good-natured--quick to annoyance, but slow to anger. When I signed up for this whole African-American thing, I expected some prejudice, a bit of racism, stereotyping, good music, and even a bit of exoticism. I, even at the tender age of a zygote, foresaw more than a few occasions of racial profiling.

So, in my youth, I took it all in stride. Didn't get too angry. Never (completely) lost my mind. I'd been stopped by the police for driving while black, walking while black, looking at them the wrong way while black, looking at them period while black, for being black, looking black, and, for all I know, smelling black (but never sounding black--how odd). As far as I'm concerned, I've done my time (one night for drunken disorderly at Cook County's Finest).

But, as I said, I'm a fairly reasonable man. So, when one of Bethesda's finest profiled me almost two years ago, I took it all in stride. Hell, I even made light of it. After all, I was 38. It had been a long time since I'd had any kind of interaction with po-po. It reminded me of my youth.

However, people, play time is over! I'm 40. I don't have time for and I am too old for this shit. This has just got to stop. Do you hear me, Bethesda P.D.? Hunh?!

Damned Socialist Founding Fathers

Earlier this week, I heard Virginia's Minister of Homophobic, Racist, You-Name-It Propaganda Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli talking about Virginia's law suit against "Obama," claiming, as usual, that, if health care reform is allowed to continue, America will be "crossing the line" where Congress will be able to force every citizen to purchase a consumer product. Later, his boss, Governor Bob "Il Douche" McDonnell further elaborated that Congress will be "crossing the line," taking over yet another duty that should be relegated to the states. And beneath all their ahistoric ramblings, you could just hear the whispered refrain, "Socialism ... Socialism ... Socialism ..."

Of course, once again, Republican analysis of American politics has absolutely nothing to do with their studying actual American history. Because, comrades, that dear Socialist line was crossed ages ago by none other than our Marxist-Leninist-Maoist Founding Fathers and signed into law by the Supreme Soviet himself, George Washington.

Oh, Juan

I need to start this post by making myself perfectly clear: I am not a Juan Williams fan. I owe the brother a huge debt of gratitude for his Eyes on the Prize documentary series. However, for the past few years, he's been steady-pissing me off. That Rupert Murdoch money has been getting too good to him, and he's been becoming more conservative by the fiscal year. He had a particularly large bug up his bugger over Obama in '08, and his calling the First Lady Stokely Carmichael in drag was way out of bounds. All that being said, the only thing more annoying than Williams' pseudo-sagacious commentary these past few years is his being fired by NPR for that same commentary last night.

The reason given for the termination was a comment Williams made on The O'Reilly Factor earlier this week:

"I mean, look, Bill, I'm not a bigot. You know the kind of books I've written about the civil rights movement in this country. But when I get on a plane, I got to tell you, if I see people who are in Muslim garb and I think, you know, they're identifying themselves first and foremost as Muslims, I get worried. I get nervous." 

NPR claims that Williams' statements "were inconsistent with our editorial standards and practices, and undermined his credibility as a news analyst with NPR." Earlier today on that same network, one of their executives also claimed that Williams' spouting his opinion like that on Fox also undermined said "credibility."

Now, That Was a Bad Idea

Reading Sebastian Junger's riveting book, War, at work about a combat unit in the Korengal Valley in Afghanistan. It's an intense work. The stories are so personal, you actually feel like you're getting to know some of the soldiers. The portrayal of combat is so visceral, you get nervous along with them. And, of course, you mourn their losses. It is such a good book, I highly recommend it to everyone. Of course, with a younger brother about to ship off to Afghanistan (after he's already survived Iraq) was just a fucking bad idea.

The Bill Campbell: Misanthrope Show ... Minisode 4: Happy Birthday, Poohbutt!!!

Please, do me the favor and give this minisode a listen.

Gil Scott-Heron & Brian Jackson – Your Daddy Loves You

Al Jarreau – My Favorite Things

Medeski, Martin & Wood – Hickory Dickory Dock

Bill Cosby & Morgan Freeman – Jellybelly

Bob Dorough – Three Is the Magic Number

Stevie Wonder – Isn’t She Lovely?

Toots & The Maytals – Monkey Man

Desmond Dekker – Honour Your Mother and Father

The Tennors – Ride Yu Donkey

Harry Belafonte – The Banana Boat Song

Heatwave – Star of the Story

Prince – I Wish U Heaven