Wednesday, September 29, 2010

The Bill Campbell: Misanthrope Show -- Minisode 3: Pink Metal Jacket

What Happened When Don't Ask/Don't Tell Was Repealed

Please. Give it a listen.

The Weather Girls - It's Raining Men
Sylvester - You Make Me Feel

Grace Jones - Pull up to the Bumper
Frankie Goes to Hollywood - Relax
Bronski Beat - Smalltown Boy

David Bowie - Right
Village People - San Francisco (You've Got Me)

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Dear "Christian" "Constitutionalist"

I know this is like beatin' a dead ho'e in the mouth. I understand that anything I say will not, in any way, sway your world view. You have Truth--your own truth--a truth so deep--a truth so profound--it really has nothing to do with Truth at all. So, I don't even know why I'm bothering to write this.

It's just that, see, I'm a bit of a history nerd. History utterly fascinates me. I don't think it's his story or her story. It is our story. It is the most important story ever written and, for obvious reasons, is told and retold every day.

It's not just that people who don't understand it are doomed to repeat it. Respecting history is a way that we can understand where we are as a species, where we have come from, and where we are going. It is a way to respect the people who came before us.

It is important for all of us to get our history right. And when you morph it, rewrite it, totally ignore it, or mutilate it into a mangled corpse for your own designs, you do us all a disservice and spit on the graves of those you claim to admire. 

Thursday, September 23, 2010

They're All a Bunch of Racists -- My White Boss Informs Me

Out of nowhere this morning:

Mrs. Charlie: You know, with all he's done, if Obama were white, people would be jumping for joy.

Billanthrope: Well, the Republicans would still hate him.

Mrs. Charlie: I'm not talking about them. I'm talking about all the people who call themselves "moderates" and "independents."

Billanthrope: Liberals seem to be hating on him a lot lately, too.

Mrs. Charlie: We all have our problems with him, of course. I've just been noticing lately that people keep complaining about how he's not doing anything. But he's actually done a lot. It's just no one is giving him credit for what he's done. And I'm just starting to think it's because he's black.

Billanthrope: Well, Mrs. Charlie, we black folks are raised to believe that even if we're twice as good as white people, we still won't be considered an equal--or something along those lines.

Mrs. Charlie: I guess I'm finally starting to come around to that way of thinking. I guess it's because I'm white.

Billanthrope: I guess we should be getting back to work, shouldn't we, Mrs. Charlie?

Mrs. Charlie: Good idea, Bill.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Buy Pop Culture Today!!!

The electronic version of my new book, Pop Culture: Politics, Puns, and Poohbutt from a Liberal Stay-at-Home Dad, went on sale just a few minutes ago--apparently.

Buy it today for less than $8 (the royalties should be just enough to buy Poohbutt some chicken nuggets):


"Bill's essays are by turns funny, serious, angry, insightful, and always compelling. He made me rethink much of what I thought I knew. I loved seeing politics and pop culture through his eyes."

--Steve Denton, Monkey Muck  

“Bill Campbell tackles race and religion, culture and class, politics and parenthood in this whip-smart collection of articles, essays and rants.  Both urban and urbane, his writing is sharp and modern, adorned with moments of great humor, insight and tenderness (and not only where his little daughter is concerned).”

--Shani Ferguson, Ratphooey  

“Campbell gives us interesting mini history lessons as they relate to current events.  And makes us LIKE them.  Dude cracks me up.”


Monday, September 20, 2010

The Impeachment of Barack Hussein Obama


"If you look long and hard enough for something, you will ultimately find it. Even if what you were looking for never really existed in the first place."

Those were the cryptic words Hunter Cullen White left me with earlier this evening at a Capitol Hill bar. It was a ruggedly cold afternoon, with a bitterly fierce wind slicing through DC, a perfect metaphor for the atmosphere here in Washington. The second week of Pres. Obama's impeachment had just come to a calamitous end--with several key Democrats storming out of the proceedings--and the architect behind said impeachment wanted to talk.

Many outside of Washington have never heard of Hunter White, but those inside the Beltway either exalt his prodigious mind or tremble in fear of his power.

This graduate of Jerry Falwell's Liberty University and University of Virginia's Law School first arrived in Washington in 1995 with the "Republican Revolution." He immediately landed a communications position with Tom DeLay's Congressional office. Some unofficially credit him for first finding Paula Jones and then Linda Tripp and Monica Lewinsky. Many think White the driving force behind Bill Clinton's own impeachment trial.

"We learned a lot of things with the Clinton debacle," White declared, behind a Grey Goose spritzer and piercing blue eyes. "We learned that we acted too late."

"What do you mean?" I asked, behind a Red Stripe.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

The Bill Campbell: Misanthrope Show Episode 5--The Charlie Rangel, Innocent Man Project

Shootin' the Shinola with Charlie * Never Hip-Hop Like This * Jimi Hendrix


Bobbi Humphrey – Harlem River Drive

North West Metropolis w/Cee Major & Pete Philly – Inside Out
Black Moon – How Many MCs (Must Get Dissed)
New York Port Authority – I Got It
George Duke – Omi (Fresh Water)
Cassiano – Onda

UB40 – Sardonicus
Diplo w/Sandra Melody, Vybz Cartel & Pantera Os – Diplo Rhythm
Major Lazer w/Vybz Cartel – Pon de Floor
Stereotyp w/Tikiman – Fling Style
Peter Tosh – Downpressor Man

Led Zeppelin – When the Levees Break
Boogie Down Productions w/Just-Ice – Ya Slippin’
Handsome Boy Modeling School – Rock n’ Roll (Could Never Hip-Hop Like This)
Rage against the Machine – Mic Check
Bullion – Sloop Jay D

Earth Wind & Fire – Evil
Rotary Connection – Respect
Marie Queenie Lyons – See and Don’t See
Disco Dub Band – For the Love of Money
Shango – A Taste of Honey
Harlem River Drive – Harlem River Drive Theme

Jimi Hendrix – Who Knows

I hope you check it out. And I pray that you enjoy it.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

High Fructose Orwell Juice

Browsing my Facebook friends' status updates earlier today, I saw that one friend asked the food industry if they thought we, the consumer, were going to be fooled by their changing the name of high fructose corn syrup to "corn sugar."

Now, I'm sick with the flu. I have hacked and vomited so many times that my every abdominal muscle is killing me. I'm exhausted, not so "high on life" at the moment, and keep watching true crime shows on cable. So, all I keep thinking is "Yes ... Oh, God. Yes."

I confess, I haven't really gotten into the science behind the high fructose backlash. The stuff kinda creeps me out. I mean, anything that can be made that cheaply, become anything you want it to become, taste like anything you want it to taste, and be in just about everything bad for you, can't be good. I'm not alone in this. Face it, the stuff does have a bad rep--deserved, or not--and a name change can only do the Satan sap good.

There are several reasons I think this can work. ValuJet was getting slammed for its plane crash in the Everglades back in the mid-90s and the FAA started exposing the airline's shady safety record. They changed  their name to AirTran, and it was like the whole nightmare went away. And have you ever seen the list of chemicals they've allowed to list under "Natural Flavors"?

Saturday, September 11, 2010

A Christian Democracy?

All right, yall, it's September 11th. So, I'm not going to spread my nation's cyber bytes full of vitriol and snark today. But I do want to ask a serious question--or ask a question seriously--not sure about the grammar on that one.

Anyway, I'm reading this book, Kingdom Coming by Michelle Goldberg, about the rise of Christian nationalism in the United States. It's an interesting book--and somewhat terrifying.

However, in KC Christian nationalists and fundamentalists declare that this is a Christian nation founded by Christians for Christians on Christian principles. It's nothing I haven't heard before, and Liberals try to PC-up the same claim by calling them Judeo-Christian values. But some on the Christian Right even claim that the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution were written with the help of the Bible.

Now, secular humanist that I am, I've often thought that those glorious forefathers of ours founded this nation on the principles, theories, and beliefs of the French and Scottish Enlightenments. There sure is enough scholarship to back that up.

So, I'm wondering ... Are there actually any instances/passages/verses/etc. in the Bible that promote, predict, or prescript Democracy or the Representational Republic in which we live?

Seriously, is there anything other than belief to back up these Christians' claims?

[AUTHOR'S NOTE: Speaking of "Christian values," I recently read that the early abolitionists had to stop arguing for the freeing of the slaves on "Christian" grounds because there were actually more passages in the Bible condoning slavery than condemning it and, in public debate, pro-slavery Southerners would constantly hand their ... hats to them.]

Friday, September 10, 2010

The Bill Campbell: Misanthrope Show Minisode 2: Get Off Your Ass and Jam

THIS WEEK'S SPECIAL: My heartfelt rant against my fellow, whiny Liberals. Enjoy!

Funkadelic – Get Off Your Ass and Jam

The Doobie Brothers – Takin’ it to the Streets * Curtis Mayfield – Get Down * Marva Broome & The Art Ensemble of Chicago – Mystifying Mama

Ramp – The American Promise * Flying Lotus – Do the Astral Plane * MF Grimm – American Hunger (Breakfast)

Johnny Mandel – Suicide Is Painless

Thursday, September 9, 2010


I never will, by any word or act, bow to the shrine of intolerance or admit a right of inquiry into the religious opinions of others.

--Thomas Jefferson (oh yeah, Lefties can cherry-pick TJ quotes, too)

As we all know by now, some kooky pastor, Rev. Terry Jones, from a backwater Florida micro-church has made international news by claiming that he's going to burn the Quran on Saturday, September 11, because Islam kills Christians. Or something like that.

I gotta admit, as a publicity stunt, Jones has pulled off the Coup of the Year. Like Swamp Thing, he has risen from the toxic Florida sludge to terrify the entire world. He's basking in his 15 minutes now, but Lord knows, his spotlight will burn on for at least another hour at least. I see guest sermons all across this nation's fundamentalist circuit, at least one book deal, radio and television interviews, a little 69 love fest with Pat Robertson. All hail, Joe the Pastor! Wurzelbacher, look out!

And forgive me Father, for I have sinned, but I gotta confess ... I kinda want him to do it.

No, I don't hate Islam nor Muslims. Too many Muslims saved my ass back when I used to live in the Czech Republic for me to have nothing but love for those People of the Book. I owe Ayman, Bushara, Abdelatif, Mamadou, Dame, and too many others for me to feel otherwise.

It's just that I'm an American, a proud American, and I believe in all the things that make America great! Unlike all these hand-wringing Liberals whining about how this country was founded on religious freedom and tolerance, I--and the Tea Baggers--know the truth. Rev. Terry Jones is simply being true to American history.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Quote of the Day ... Hannah Arendt

"Before they seize power and establish a world according to their doctrines, totalitarian movements conjure up a lying world of consistency which is more adequate to the needs of the human mind than reality itself. ... The force possessed by totalitarian propaganda--before the movements have the power to drop iron curtains to prevent anyone's disturbing, by the slightest reality, the gruesome quiet of an entirely imaginary world--lies in its ability to shut the masses off from the real world."

Sounds like Fox News, don't it?

Sunday, September 5, 2010

And the Moral Is ... ?

I am not a modern-day parent. I am Old School. Or some bizarre kind of PC time-tempered version of said Old School. I grew up believing that my parents' word was Law. I may have questioned--mentally--but I would never, ever verbalize those questions. Hell, growing up, I was raised to not even look like I was questioning that Law. Or else there would have been hell to pay.

I can even remember the first time I went to a white friend's house and being shocked and horrified when I saw that white friend not only question his parents but his actually yelling back at his parents and even cursing at them. And then I think my eight-year-old heart actually went into cardiac arrest when the parents not only didn't whup the boy unconscious but just ... just ... they just ignored the little brat. I was so shocked and disgusted, I briefly contemplated taking off my own belt and whipping the little snot for them.

It wasn't like I was abused, or anything. I don't even remember being hit all that often. Now, as a parent, I realize that I wasn't hit nearly as often as any parent--no matter how pacifistic--wants to actually hit their child. I guess I was lucky. But you couldn't tell me that. The belief that my folks would hit me was always there. The threat always loomed. It pretty much always kept me in line.

I've talked to many white folks about these things who have literally blanched in horror at my affectionate tales of childhood fright. Who want to bring parents like mine up on charges at the Hague. Many have felt that the physical punishment and/or the incredibly severe groundings (one summer I spent the entire month of June in-doors because I dissed one friend in order to hang out with some other "cooler" friends--and girls!) should be listed as crimes against humanity. After all, kids will be kids.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Cee-Lo's Made It Official

So now, the most popular video on YouTube for the past couple of weeks now has an official video. I hope yall enjoy.

Friday, September 3, 2010

The Bill Campbell: Misanthrope Show -- Episode 4

All right, I think I'm finally starting to get comfortable before the microphone. I become more and more misanthropic by the minute!

Anyway, just click on that little widget to your right and give it a listen. Here's the playlist:

Steele Beautttah – Africa * Manu Dibango – Weya * Nneka – Suffri * Wale & K’Naan – TV in the Radio * Letta Mbulu – Mahlela * Mulatu Astatke – Yegelle Tezeta *

Tim Maia – O caminho do bem * Dexter – Ultima viagem * Black Milk – Give the Drummer Sum * Mr. Chop – T.R.O.Y. * King Tee – Ruff Rhyme (Back Again) *

Mos Def – Dollar Day * The Meters – Handclapping Song * Dixie Cups – Iko Iko * Eddie Bo – Eddie’s Rubber Band * The Wild Magnolias – Soul Soul Soul *

Dr. John – Let the Good Times Roll * Irma Thomas – Turn My World Around * Lee Dorsey – Night People * The Explosions – Hip Drop * Smokey Johnson – It Ain’t My Fault * Mystikal – Bouncin’ Back (Bumpin’ Me Against the Wall) *

Sly & The Family Stone – Don’t Call Me Nigger, Whitey * Slum Village – Earl Flinn * Oscar Brown Jr. – Brother Where Are You? (Matthew Herbert Remix) * Rodriguez – Rich Folks Hoax *

Fela – Sorrow Tears & Blood